That’s it. Another year ends. 365 days done. 365 sunrises
and sunsets. Breakfasts and meals.
I had some major plans for myself this year. Let me tell
you, I didn’t come anywhere close it. I am not talking about the regular
resolutions. I don’t believe in new year resolutions. If I need to change
something, I need to better myself, I will start it right now. If I am in a
mood for procrastination, then I will start it tomorrow. That’s how much I can
delay things. That’s my degree of laziness.
So, back to resolutions. Why do we make them? Why the, “From
this year I will start saving up” or “From Monday I will start eating healthy”?
Why not start saving up right now? Why not keep aside that bowl of biryani and
pick a sandwich for lunch?
I know it’s not easy.
But it isn’t impossible either. Everyone is made differently. Some have a
greater will power than the others. The key word being “greater”. It doesn’t
mean that the other person lacks it completely. He has to just go through a
little more struggle than others. Doesn’t that make the achievement even more
special? Doesn’t this now become greater than the strong willed guy’s feat?
I have a friend. He just doesn’t sleep on time ever. I mean
ever. Forget the nights he is working or socializing. Even if there is nothing
to do, he would still find an excuse to stay up late in the night. And,
unfortunately for him, he is someone who can’t function very well with lack of
sleep. So, he would wake up late the next day and there, half the day gone.
Now, I am someone who can make do with even a couple of hours of sleep.
So, whenever we would
stay out late in the night and I would crib about having to be at work the next
day, I would get a “Oh come on! Why do you have to worry? You can easily manage
it.” That’s not true. I can make do with less sleep. But, that doesn’t mean
it’s easy. I am tired by mid-day and my productivity goes down. At the same
time, if this friend wakes up early in the morning, I am mighty surprised and
borderline proud too. We both are struggling but his struggle seems real. Even
to me.
He has been talking about getting into the “good habit” of
sleeping on time for years. Every time the topic comes up; he agrees that he
has to do it. Hasn’t happened. And, I don’t know if and when it will. (I really
hope it does though)
We avoid a lot of things. Going to the gym, starting a diet,
telling someone we love them, telling someone we hate them, apologize, start a
difficult task. Even when certain things are crucial to our future.
Why do we all, do this? Knowing that something isn’t good or
right, knowing there is something much better, we hang on to the same old
things. Is it the comfort of the known or the fear of the unknown? Is it just
about habits? Is it the fear of taking an action which would be unpleasant or
even cause us some pain?
But, can’t this pain become our guide? Last year I had lost
a lot of weight. Yes. I had become skinnier than I am right now. I knew it. I
could see it. I had to stop being wrapped up in whatever I was wrapped up in and
take a conscious effort to start eating well again. But, it was so easy to not
care. My body had become used to the bird sized portions and it took a lot of
effort to even force another morsel down.
But, the jokes, the taunts and the comments started becoming difficult
to deal with. The final stab being, when a good friend, I was meeting after a
long time, joked that he got injured by my pokey bones while giving me a hug.
That hurt. A lot. But this pain helped me wake up and finally work towards
getting healthier. It took months to put on a meager kilogram. I still am too
skinny by most people’s standards. (Not like I care about other’s opinions about
my body much anymore. We will talk about skinny shaming some other day.) But, I
am on that path. Every meal, a conscious effort to be healthy.
Procrastinators are not born. They are made. And, whatever
is made can be unmade too. So, stop lying to yourself saying, “I will be better
equipped to deal with this tomorrow.” Stop looking for distractions. Stop checking
your Instagram account in the middle of writing that report. Stop being scared
of failures. Stop making resolutions you won’t keep. Stop waiting for tomorrow.
Today. It’s all about today.
So, pop open the champagne and apply for that job.
So, pop open that champagne and book that solo trip.
So, pop open the champagne and ask that cute guy/girl out
for a coffee.
So, pop open that champagne and hug your friend hard and
tell them you love them.
Just pop open the champagne.
Today.
